


And They Were Snowbound

by TheFoolsKnight



Category: Shadowhunters (TV), The Eldest Curses Series - Cassandra Clare, The Mortal Instruments Series - Cassandra Clare, The Shadowhunter Chronicles - All Media Types
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Feelings, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Malec Secret Santa 2020, One Night Stands, Past Relationship(s), Post-Break Up, Regret, Second Chances, Snowed In, Time Skips, True Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-14
Updated: 2020-12-14
Packaged: 2021-03-11 02:15:06
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,319
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28067637
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheFoolsKnight/pseuds/TheFoolsKnight
Summary: Ten years ago, Magnus and Alec were in love, but fell apart when disagreements threatened their relationship.Ten years past, they meet again, this time at a reunion, and Magnus asks Alec for one last night together. He says yes.But when a blizzard takes over the city, the two of them find themselves snowed in together, with no means of leaving. Will they be able to get through unscathed, or will sparks fly once more?
Relationships: Magnus Bane/Alec Lightwood
Comments: 27
Kudos: 72
Collections: The Malec Secret Santa - Edition 2020





	And They Were Snowbound

**Author's Note:**

  * For [nhixxie](https://archiveofourown.org/users/nhixxie/gifts).



> Merry Christmas, giftee!! (I'm sorry, I don’t know your name and I don't want to assume either😅)   
> I read through some of your fics here on Ao3, and I was impressed! I could gather from your writings that you love delving into feelings, so here's as many feels as I could fit into 5k words. If you're the kind to listen to music while you read, I recommend Taylor Swift's Folklore, since I had it on repeat while I wrote - especially the song My Tears Ricochet.  
> Once again, Merry Christmas and Happy New Year, and I hope you'll enjoy my little gift!

The bed that Alec was lying on was  _ definitely  _ not his.

He frowned, taking a moment to collect his bearings, thinking back to last night’s events. He remembered the reunion party, remembered meeting all of his older friends, and even-

_ Magnus. _

Thinking of his name was enough to send a pang through Alec’s heart, reminding him of heartbreak long gone by. Last night, both of them had agreed that bygones were bygones, and then-

_ Just one night. For old times sake. _

Magnus’s voice had been smooth as wine, his lips brushing warm against Alec’s ear, and Alec had never been able to say ‘no’ to him.

So here he was, several years after they’d broken up back in high school, lying in Magnus’s bed with all of his clothes scattered around on the floor, and having had only two, maybe three drinks, he had been sober enough last night that now he could recall every single second of the fervent, desperate sex they’d had last night with absolute clarity. 

Strangely, he didn’t regret it.

The room was empty of anyone but him, lying in the vast bed with its rumpled satin bedspread. The smooth cloth was oddly soothing against his bare skin. Alec slowly sat up, pulling the blanket closer to himself. If he had to walk through the house wrapped in a blanket to find Magnus, so be it.

Before he actually stood up, however, the door opened and Magnus stepped in, sporting a large smile and a mug of coffee, if the enchanting aroma was anything to go by. Alec tensed a moment, then immediately forced himself to relax. This was nothing. They had nothing going on here. They were just two exes who had a one-night stand, that was all.

“Good morning,” Magnus chirped, a little too brightly, and moved to sit in front of Alec. He held out the cup of coffee and Alec accepted it graciously, grimacing when the first sip of coffee burned his tongue.

Magnus chuckled. “I see you still have a habit of drinking your coffee while it’s too hot.”

Alec almost winced.

_ He remembers. _

“Some things never change,” was all Alec whispered in return, and this time he made sure to blow on the coffee before sipping. As he drank, his eyes betrayed him, sliding up from the rumpled sheets he had been staring at to Magnus’s legs, dark thighs gleaming appealingly against the dark magenta of his silk robe. Alec’s gaze travelled higher, skimming over the belt of the robe tied over his waist to his chest, where the robe had parted like a curtain to expose a long stretch of skin, and then higher up, taking in sharp collar bones and the curve of his neck and jawline and then Alec’s eyes met Magnus’s, who was staring back, clearly not oblivious to Alec’s ogling, and he almost choked on his coffee.

Alec immediately looked away, heat rising up to his cheeks. He nearly missed the small knowing smile that had made its way onto Magnus’s lips.

“Sorry about that,” Alec said, his voice coming out hoarser than intended.

“Oh, I don’t mind,” Magnus replied in a voice so low that Alec had almost missed it. He swallowed his nerves, his throat surprisingly dry despite the coffee.

“I’ll, um-“ Alec ducked his head, embarrassed at his own awkwardness. “Just give me a few minutes and I’ll be out of our hair.”

Magnus was silent, and Alec cautiously looked up after waiting for a few moments for a reply. He frowned when he saw Magnus looking out the window, a frown on his usually unblemished face.

“What’s wrong?” Alec asked.

“Right. About that. You can’t leave, I’m afraid,” Magnus said in an apologetic voice, turning to look at Alec with an equally apologetic look. “See, we were oblivious to it last night, but-“

“But what?” Alec asked, his heartbeat quickening. Magnus’s hesitation was beginning to worry him.

Magnus sighed and visibly braced himself. “There was a blizzard last night. A really heavy one at that.”

Alec frowned. “How heavy?”

Magnus bit his lip. “About 25 inches.”

Alec’s eyes flew wide open at that, and he gaped at Magnus for a long moment before gulping down the rest of the coffee.

“The roads are too full of snow to be driving, and the subway is closed,” Magnus went on, stating the obvious as if Alec didn’t know. “I’m afraid you’re stuck here until- well, until the authorities finally get rid of all the snow.”

“So basically,” Alec mumbled, more to himself than to Magnus. “We’re stuck together. For the whole day. Maybe even more than a day.”

Magnus gave him a sweet, apologetic smile and took the now empty cup from Alec. “I’m afraid so, darling.”

Well,  _ fuck. _

A few hours later found Alec and Magnus sitting on opposite ends of the couch in the living room, classical music playing in the background while Magnus idly tapped away at his phone and Alec absentmindedly watched the news on the large TV in front of him. A reporter was standing in front of a snowy background, talking about the blizzard that had hit the city last night.

“How is it that  _ she  _ gets to leave her house?” Alec mumbled.

“Because it’s her duty,” Magnus replied almost immediately in a dry tone. “And we’ll just be useless citizens getting in the way of the media and the authorities.”

Alec sighed and slumped back into the cushions. “This sucks.”

Magnus spared Alec a glance away from his phone.

“Don’t look at me like that,” Alec grumbled. “I didn’t expect to be stuck in a house with my ex-boyfriend, you know.”

“Rude,” Magnus muttered, turning back to his phone.

“No offence,” Alec amended immediately. “It’s just… this is awkward.”

He gestured between the two of them, the vast stretch of the couch separating them. Magnus’s eyes briefly flickered towards him.

“That’s not what you were saying last night,” Magnus mumbled, turning his eyes up to the ceiling. Alec had to resist the urge to throw a pillow at him.

Instead he shifted in his seat, turning away from Magnus and idly drumming his fingers over his knee.

This was never supposed to happen. Last night was supposed to be sex, and sex alone. Alec was supposed to have woken up this morning and walked out without another word, maybe take a shower if he was lucky. He wasn’t supposed to be forced to spend a day or two extra with Magnus. He had no idea what to think of this now. He had no idea no how to handle being around Magnus.

A pang rang out through Alec’s heart, nearly rendering him breathless for a moment. He took a deep breath, and out of the corner of his eye, looked at Magnus again.

Magnus’s side of the couch was towards the balcony on the far end of the hall, and silvery light streamed in through the glass french doors, outlining Magnus’s profile in blinding white. He was utterly oblivious to Alec’s staring, his gaze focused on his phone, and judging by the way he was tapping away insistently, he was clearly texting someone. Magnus had changed out of his robe and was now dressed in simple jeans that hugged his legs and a muted blue sweatshirt. His hair was styled up into a mohawk, but a few stubborn strands hung over Magnus’s forehead, making Alec resist the urge to reach out and brush them out of the way. Several years ago, Alec wouldn’t have to resist.

A memory flashed in front of his eyes, unbidden, of his fingers brushing across Magnus’s forehead, and Magnus slowly breaking out into a bright smile, his eyes glittering. It tugged powerfully at his heartstrings now, the memory and the distance and all the years and  _ Magnus. _

He wasn’t going to survive this at all.

_ “Hey, Magnus?” _

_ “Yes, darling?” _

_ “I was wondering…” _

_ “...” _

_ “What happens after this?” _

_ “It depends. What do you want?” _

_ “... I don’t know.” _

_ “Alec-“ _

_ “It’s either losing you or losing my family, Magnus. You know how they get.” _

_ “I know.” I know which one you’d rather lose. _

Magnus returned the jar of spice to its place on the shelf, and despite himself, turned to glance at Alec.

Alec still hadn’t moved from his spot on the couch. He was now leaning back into the cushions, his legs pulled up against his chest and balanced on the edge of the couch. His gaze, from what Magnus could see, was focused on the television, which now seemed to be playing infomercials. Magnus let his own gaze linger on Alec for a moment - he seemed exhausted, his hair sticking up in all directions as if Alec had continuously been running his hand through it. Maybe he had.

He was currently wearing one of Magnus’s more sober shirts along with sweatpants - also Magnus’s - since he couldn’t spend a whole day indoors wearing a suit. Alec seemed distant, his gaze faraway as he reached up a hand, and just as Magnus predicted, ran it through his hair, messing it up even more. Unbidden, a soft smile made its way onto Magnus’s face.

He remembered those days, when things seemed more simple and complex at the same time, when Alec would often drop by his house after soccer practice, his hair all ruffled up from an hour of roughhousing. Magnus remembered how incredibly soft his hair was to the touch, whenever he’d run his hand through it during secretive kisses exchanged all those years ago, and then again last night.

Magnus had no idea what he’d been thinking last night, when he’d walked up to Alec and offered him, as he’d put it so eloquently, ‘drinks and something more’. He’d seen Alec, standing among the crowd with a flute of champagne in his hand, and had the breath knocked out of him immediately.

Even after all those years, Alec was just as handsome as ever.

Even after all those years, Magnus was just as in love with him as ever.

He was a fool.

Magnus took a deep breath and turned off the stove, stepping into the living room. There was no point dwelling on the past. The past was the past, bygones were bygones. 

He raised an eyebrow at the infomercial playing on TV. “Now, what would you need a super mega slicer for?”

“It helps slice vegetables faster,” Alec said dryly. “Very helpful in the kitchen.”

“My my,” Magnus teased, leaning against the wall closest to him. “Has Alexander finally learned to cook a proper meal?”

Alec mumbled something unintelligible and shrugged. Upon noticing Magnus’s gaze, he finally relented and sighed, 

“I’m an adult, I had to,” he said monotonously. “It’s not like I have anyone to cook for me anyway.”

“You have me now,” Magnus blurted out, unable to help himself.

Alec looked at him, and then away, then opened and closed his mouth several times before falling silent and looking away.

Magnus took pity on him and decided to let it drop. “Anyway, I much prefer cutting vegetables with a knife. Somehow, they taste better.”

Alec snorted. “Why, though?”

Magnus grinned at him. “It’s the magic of things handmade with love as opposed to those manufactured by machines, darling.”

nufactured by machines, love."

Alec flushed at the endearment and looked away, though he didn't let the conversation stop in its track. "You sound like my mother."

"In good ways, I hope." Magnus beckoned Alec closer with one hand and retreated into the kitchen, yelling over his shoulder as he went, "Anyways, lunch is ready. I'm afraid you'll have to come over to take a bite."

Magnus heard Alec sigh loudly from the living room and chuckled to himself as he mixed the fried rice one last time. He heard footsteps from behind him, followed by Alec’s voice.

"Where are the plates?"

"Top left drawer," Magnus said, taking a bit of the rice and tasting it to make sure there was enough salt. "Spoons in the one to the right."

Magnus realized he still had to add some coriander leaves, and turned to get them, nearly bumping into Alec who had retrieved the plates. They stared at each other for a moment, and then Magnus turned away, breaking the moment and sidestepping to get to the fridge.

They worked together, Alec setting the table while Magnus topped the jar of water and added some finishing touches to the rice. Soon, everything was set and as they ate, Magnus couldn’t help but glance at Alec every few seconds, who had immediately dug into the food.

It didn’t take long for Alec to notice his staring, and he immediately slowed down his chewing, turning his eyes to the far wall. A few awkward moments passed, then Alec cleared his throat and said, “Um, this tastes good.”

“I’m glad.” Magnus offered him a small smile, mentally chiding himself and making a note to take the staring down a notch. He couldn’t help himself, though. Alec was extremely handsome, now more than ever before, and he had missed him so much-

The memory of their breakup snapped at Magnus’s brain like the slap of a rubber band, and Magnus composed himself, shaking all thoughts of Alec out of his mind. 

Several awkward moments passed in silence with Magnus and Alec eating and avoiding each other’s gazes, the only sounds in the living room being the clink of steel spoons against ceramic and the distant echo of a Christmas carol from the neighbouring house.

Alec cleared his throat, making Magnus look at him with mild surprise, and asked, “So, what do you do?”

Magnus shrugged, slowly chewing on his mouthful of rice before swallowing it down. “Well, I got into fashion, set up some stores across the country. Business is doing good so far. What about you?”

Alec hesitated, then said, “I’m, uh, a lawyer.”

Magnus tapped his spoon against the plate, avoiding Alec’s eyes. “Doing exactly what your parents wanted to do, huh?”

Alec was silent. He felt something bitter stir inside of him, old memories of heartbreak creeping up on him again.

“I’m surprised you didn’t get married to a woman and have three kids already,” Magnus muttered, mostly to himself, but not low enough that Alec couldn’t hear him.

The room was dangerously silent. Magnu could feel Alec’s gaze on him, but he avoided it in favour of poking at his rice.

Then there was the sound of a chair scraping against the floor and Magnus turned to see that Alec was standing, his hands laid flat on the table, his gaze turned downwards. He looked incredibly distant for a moment, then stepped away from the table.

“I’m not hungry anymore,” Alec mumbled, heading towards the bedrooms before visibly reconsidering and walking to the couch. Magnus watched as he flopped onto the couch, his face turned away, and then turned to his own plate.

He wasn’t hungry anymore either.

_ “Can’t you explain to your parents, Alexander? Maybe they’ll understand…” _

_ “They won’t, Magnus. They want me to date and get married to some woman. My father has said several times exactly what he thinks about people like this. They won’t change, Magnus. I’m sorry.” _

_ “Then we’ll run away. We can go someplace far from your parents. We could be happy together.” _

_ “I can’t leave them behind… I love my parents. I love Izzy and Jace and Max… I can’t just leave.” _

_ “Don’t you love me, Alexander?” _

_ “I do! God, I love you more than everything… but Magnus, they’re my family. I can’t-“ _

_ “Why not? If they don’t love you for who you are… then they don’t love you at all.” _

_ “It’s not that simple.” _

_ “I believe it is.” _

_ “Of course you do- you don’t have parents, you’ve never had to come out to anyone, you won’t understand!” _

_ “...” _

_ “...” _

_ “I see how it is.” _

_ “Magnus- Magnus, wait!” _

“I  _ was  _ married.”

Magnus looked up from his book so fast he nearly got whiplash. Alec was laying on the couch on his back, staring up at the ceiling, one hand draped over his chest. His eyes flickered from one point to another on the ceiling as he spoke on,

“I met her in college,” he said, licking his lips, his voice slightly rough. “We got married after graduation. Divorced a year and a half later.”

Alec turned to Magnus, meeting his eyes, and it wasn’t until a few seconds later that it occurred to Magnus that he was supposed to reply.

“Oh,” he said, blinking. “Alec, I-“

Alec waved it off. “Don’t say you’re sorry. It’s fine, it was all in the past.”

Magnus gave a small, imperceptible nod and shifted awkwardly, fiddling with his phone. “Did she know?” 

“Yes.”

“And your parents?” Magnus looked at Alec expectantly.

Alec bit his lip. “They know. They reacted exactly how I expected them to.”

“Oh,” was all Magnus said in a low voice.

Alec shrugged. “I mean, it’s fine. I wasn’t a seventeen year old afraid of getting kicked out of home. I had a job, an apartment of my own… it was fine.”

“Is it fine now?” Magnus asked.

Alec turned on his side so he could face Magnus as he spoke. “I’m still talking to my siblings. My parents like to pretend I don’t exist, though. It… it hurts a little. I’m not going to lie. But at least I know I can be happy now.”

A small smile graced Magnus’s features. “That’s good.”

Alec was silent for a moment, then added, “I wanted to tell you about it, but I didn’t know how to reach you. No one from our grade knew about your whereabouts. I tried your phone number-“

“I had to change it.” Magnus’s smile turned sheepish and a little apologetic. “Crazy exes and all.”

“Oh.” Alec nodded, and shifted to tuck his arm under his head. “Did you ever… you know, want to find me?”

Magnus felt a pang in his heart. “I did. Turns out ‘Alexander Lightwood’ is more common of a name on Instagram than I thought.”

Alec grinned. “I don’t have an Instagram.”

“Ah, no wonder I couldn’t find you.” Magnus returned the grin. “Too bad. I spent several hours scrolling through all the names trying to find you.”

Alec blinked at him, astonished. “Wait, really?”

Magnus sobered up and shot him a coy smile, humming contemplatively. “Maybe.”

Alec chuckled, sounding exasperated, and sat up straight. “Are we just going to sit here like this all day?”

Magnus closed his book and set it aside. “I suppose not. What do you want to do?”

Alec shrugged, and then glanced at the TV. “We could watch a movie.”

A sudden onslaught of memories hit Magnus like a truck, of several evenings, nights and afternoons spent with him and Alec sprawled out on the couch at Magnus’s house, or in his bed, huddled together under a blanket and watching movies on the TV or on Magnus’s laptop precariously balanced on their laps. He remembered Alec's hair brushing softly against his jawline as he'd rest his head on Magnus’s shoulder, the way their legs would tangle together, the soft kisses they would exchange in the middle of those movie marathons, the quiet conversations whispered into each other's ears.

Magnus’s lips twitched up into a small smile, unbidden. 

"Magnus?"

Magnus snapped out of his musings, turning to Alec, who was staring back with mild confusion and concern. 

"Right," Magnus said, his voice slightly rough. "Movies. Of course." 

He stood up and smiled at Alec, hoping it didn't come out wobbly. "I'll make some popcorn. Pick out a movie in the meantime."

Alec grinned, and Magnus’s heart skipped a beat. "Sure."

He turned away and practically ran into the kitchen, taking a moment to collect himself, his hands braced against the counter. 

_ Get a grip on yourself,  _ he told himself, and took a deep breath.

He thought back to last night, when he'd seen Alec among the crowd and immediately lost his breath. He'd thought he'd moved on, from Alec, from everything between them, but apparently, that wasn't the case.

So he'd approached Alec, struck up conversation, invited him to bed even though there was a voice inside him warning him against all of it, knowing that once he'd had a taste of Alec, he'd never be able to come back from it.

Yet he'd gone ahead and done it anyway. 

_ “Magnus… I can’t do this anymore.” _

_ “Why not? Why not, Alexander?” _

_ “You know why…” _

_ “Right. Your family. Sorry I asked.” _

_ “Magnus, I’m sorry-“ _

_ “ _ Don’t-“

_ “I’m really sorry, I-“ _

_ “You don’t have to explain anymore.” _

_ “Magnus-“ _

_ “...” _

_ “...” _

_ “Goodbye, Alexander.” _

The day hadn’t been as awful as Alec had dreaded it would be. 

He’d been jittery all morning, his nerves feeling as if they’d been set on fire everytime he was remotely close to Magnus. Even when Magnus was in another room, he was constantly on edge, ready to bolt from that house at any moment.

Even now, sitting on the couch with Magnus at an arm's length away, Alec wanted to run and hide from Magnus. He was extremely good at hiding it, of course, especially after they’d talked about Alec’s marriage, and yet...

He didn’t feel like showing his face to Magnus at all. He’d been a coward, he realised now, all those years ago when he was still with Magnus. If only he’d just been brave enough to come out to his parents, to hold Magnus’s hand in public, to show everyone they belonged together. Maybe he wouldn’t have had to breakup with Magnus, maybe he wouldn’t have had to marry Lydia, even if it was for a short time. Maybe he and Magnus would be watching this same movie today, in a completely different house, without any distance between them.

It hurt to think of it.

And though Alec desperately wished he could turn back time and change things, there was nothing he could do now.

“I can hear you thinking from over here.”

Alec winced and turned to Magnus, who was looking right at him, a small knowing smile on his face. 

“I know you, Alexander,” Magnus said, his hand twitching by his side, as if he wanted to reach out to Alec. “What’s going on?”

Alec blinked and shook his head, just barely opening his mouth to mumble out some excuse when Magnus spoke again.

“Thinking about what-ifs, Alexander?” 

Magnus was looking at him out of curious eyes, his head tilted towards one side. Alec’s throat went dry, and after several moments of struggling to form words, he said,

“I wish you wouldn’t say my name like that.”

Magnus laughed softly, and shifted so that he was completely facing Alec now. The movie, playing idly on the TV, was all but forgotten.

“Why not,  _ Alexander _ ?” He asked cheekily. Alec flushed and turned away, fiddling with the hem of his - no,  _ Magnus’s _ \- shirt.

“Hey.” Alec felt the couch shift beneath him, and then Magnus was right beside him, reaching out to grasp Alec’s chin and turn his face towards him. Alec’s breath hitched as his eyes met Magnus’s, shining softly in the dimly lit room.

Magnus’s eyes flicked about Alec’s face, as if examining him, his fingers still on Alec’s face. The points were they touched burned like pure fire, and Alec wouldn’t be surprised if they left marks behind after Magnus pulled away.

“I’m just… thinking, I suppose,” Alec whispered.

A minute crease formed between Magnus’s eyebrows. “About what?”

Alec smiled wryly and shrugged. “Things.”

Magnus nodded, but didn’t move. He looked expectant, as if waiting for an answer.

“I just regret things, I guess,” Alec admitted finally.

An understanding passed over Magnus’s face. “Ah, the classic ‘what-ifs’.”

Alec nodded, the wry smile still on his face.

“Things could have been different,” he whispered, his gaze dropping low.

“They always are,” Magnus said, his fingers moving from Alec’s chin to his ear, flicking at the few strands of hair that curled under Alec’s earlobe. “We can’t do anything about it, Alexander. We never can. We just make do with what we have, and move on making the best of it.”

Alec nodded, feeling a lump form in his throat. Somehow, that was exactly what he wanted to hear.

“Thank you,” he whispered.

Magnus smiled at him and lowered his hand, turning away and yet sitting right where he was, right beside Alec. He missed Magnus’s touch immediately, and resisted the urge to reach up and touch the spot where Magnus’s hand had been.

“What about you?” he asked, ruefully turning his eyes back to the TV again.

Magnus cocked his head in Alec’s direction. “What about me?”

“Do you have any regrets?”

A small, wry smile formed on Magnus’s lips. “Everyone does.”

Alec nodded and dropped the topic, trying to focus on the movie again. 

But Magnus was  _ right  _ beside him, and Alec couldn’t focus. His eyes flicked to Magnus, once, twice, and then he willed himself to stop, staring at the TV without watching anything at all.

A few heavy moments passed, and then Alec jumped when he felt Magnus shift beside him, resting his head on Alec’s shoulder. Magnus wrapped his hands around Alec’s arm, holding on, utterly silent.

Alec stared at him, pleasant surprise hazing through his senses, and he slowly leaned in, resting his cheek against the top of Magnus’s head.

“I missed this,” Alec whispered without even thinking of it, and froze.

Magnus’s hand slid down to hold Alec’s hand, giving it a reassuring squeeze. “Me too.”

Alec let out a shaky breath. “I thought bygones were bygones?”

Magnus was silent for a long time, and then he said. “What would you do if I said they weren’t?”

The pressure in Alec’s heart was too immense. For a few moments, he was unable to breathe.

“I don’t know.”

“You said you regretted something,” Magnus asked softly. “What was it?”

Alec pressed his lips tight together. “Do you want to know?”

Magnus was silent. “Maybe.”

The TV speakers blared out empty dialogues throughout the living room. Alec took a deep breath.

“I regret marrying her,” Alec whispered. “Even then, I-“

He held on to Magnus’s hand, squeezing it tight. 

“Even when I was at the altar,” Alec went on, Magnus’s words from earlier ringing in his head.  _ We move on. We make do. We make the best of what he have. _

“I could only think of you, Magnus,” Alec choked out.

Magnus froze, and immediately moved away from Alec, his ragged breathing echoing out in the space between them. His eyes were wide, his lips parting slightly as he looked at Alec.

“Alexander,” Magnus whispered, his voice beseeching.

Alec reached out, feeling disoriented, as if a large bandaid had just been ripped off of him, and took Magnus’s hand in his.

“I’d keep looking towards the door, hoping that you’d suddenly walk in and take me away from there,” Alec said, his voice breaking. Magnus exhaled, his eyes large and sorrowful as he looked at him. “Maybe I should’ve called off the wedding right away. I don’t know. I can’t change that anymore. But…”

Alec swallowed the lump in his throat, but it stubbornly lingered on. “I can only make the best of the time we have left.”

Magnus was staring at him, looking pained. Alec couldn’t tell what he was thinking - he seemed closed off, his thoughts only for himself. Heat rose up to his cheeks and he turned away, taking his hand back.

“I’m sorry, I-“ Alec cleared his throat. “I shouldn’t have- forget I said anything.”

Alec stood up, whirling away from the couch and heading straight for the door. He couldn’t think straight; he had no idea where he wanted to go, only that he had to get away from here, away from Magnus. He’d messed everything up,  _ again _ .

All he could hear was the ringing in his ears, the heartbroken beat of his heart. Alec had just reached the door and was about to reach for it when a hand grabbed his shoulder, turning him around roughly until he was facing Magnus once again.

Magnus gripped the collar of Alec’s shirt, pulling him closer, looking right into his eyes with a fierce fire burning in his own. With a shock, Alec realised that the kohl lining Magnus’s eyes was smudged, black tears lingering at the fringes of his eyes, threatening to fall.

Alec was about to open his eyes to apologise when Magnus said, his voice harsh and rough and never so beautiful as it had been in that moment, “Don’t you  _ dare  _ walk away from me again.”

Alec let loose a shaky breath and smiled a wobbly smile, his whole body slumping in relief. Magnus returned the smile, and Alec reached out to cup his face, brushing away his tears with the tips of his thumbs.

“I won’t,” Alec whispered, leaning in to touch his forehead to Magnus’s. “Never again. I promise.”

Magnus chuckled breathlessly and tilted his head, brushing his lips against Alec’s invitingly. “If you must know, bygones were never bygones, Alexander. Not with you.”

“Me too,” Alec said, and closed the distance between them.

Later they would lay in bed, lips against breathless lips, bonelessly wrapped around each other, talking about the years gone by and the years to come, smiles hidden in the curves of their shoulders and the folds of the blanket. For now, they let their bodies do the talking, pulling each other closer by their belt loops, lips chasing lips as they kissed all the way to the bedroom and beyond. Unlike last night, tonight was slow and sensual, less desperate and more a promise to stay, every breath making up for the time lost, over and over and over again.

_ No more regrets. _

The blizzard settled down a few days later, and Alec's life was back to normal,  _ almost. _

To his previous daily schedule of eight hours of working, eight hours of sleeping, two hours of eating, one hour of gym, three hours of hobbies and two hours of laying awake in bed and thinking, he now had to cut out the regret and throw in twenty-fours of loving Magnus, and it was the best choice of his life.

The days flicked by, and before they knew it, Christmas was upon them. Ten years ago, Magnus would've been extremely into the Christmas spirit, and that was one thing that hadn't changed over the years.

"Are you done?" Alec asked, trying not to laugh, his voice slightly muffled by Magnus’s stomach which was right in his face. He was holding Magnus up with his arms wrapped around Magnus’s thighs, one of his hands balanced on Alec's shoulder as he struggled to hang up a branch of mistletoe on the ceiling.

"Almost done!" Magnus answered, and a few moments later, Alec felt him tap on his shoulder. "Okay, you can let me down!"

Alec grinned and gently put Magnus down, then straightened and looked at the mistletoe with its impressive berries daintily hanging from the ceiling. In one corner of the room, the Christmas tree had already been set up, adorned with tinsel and ornaments and a large star on the top.

"It looks good," Alec said, looking up at the mistletoe. 

"Doesn't it?" Magnus’s voice was light, chirpy. "Now, kiss me."

Alec turned his grin down to Magnus and obliged, going in for a kiss and wrapping his arms around Magnus’s waist. He could feel Magnus smile against his lips, the simple smile igniting something inside Alec and sending warmth flooding through his veins.

Sometimes, he regretted that he hadn't acted sooner, that he and Magnus could've had this for the past ten years. But everytime, Magnus’s words came back to him - you can never change the past. You can only move forward.

And Alec planned to move forward, with Magnus right by his side.


End file.
